she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
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he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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