Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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