dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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