would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we literally take a cab across the street
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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