I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
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