I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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