Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
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