Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
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I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
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you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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