Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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