no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
We don't watch enough power rangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize