talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize