happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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