Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Randomize