was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize