she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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