If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
A+ Viking dick
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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