he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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