morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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