based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
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I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
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Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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