I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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