roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
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She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
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All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
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