Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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