did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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