So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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