So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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