You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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