im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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