Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
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