Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize