We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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