I seem to have left my pride at pride
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
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