Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize