I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
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