You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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