it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize