fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
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