I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
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