marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize