The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
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Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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