i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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