I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize