she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize