We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
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