she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize