sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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