He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
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I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
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Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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