anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
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