Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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