i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize