He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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